Thursday, August 16th will be the one year anniversary of my watching my first ever colic case. Unfortunately, it was Whiskey, and he didn't make it.

Each night this week, that I have wandered to the horse pen, I have felt a tremendous ache in my heart. How far would we have come this year? I wonder.

The picture of him on top of the TV stand is almost to much to take this week. I thought I was to the point of looking at it and smiling. Not this week. I fight the tears this week. Maybe I'll take it down and put it back up next week.

HFF gave me a wonderful scrapbook of his training photos at the Driftins. For now, it must go away.

Maybe next week will be better.

Today I turned 49.

49 used to seem so old.

Not that long ago I was my daughters age and my mother was 49. I thought she was older than the hills.

When people are 49 they are supposed to be grown up. I wonder if that will ever happen.

People who are 49 are supposed to be wise. Another thing that will probably never happen.

49, one less than 50. Dang, how can this be??

The kids are grown and gone. When did that happen??

So many things I was going to do someday but alot of somedays have come and gone and those things still aren't done.

49........

I try to come to work, each day with a positive attitude but when the owners don't really care, why should I? As I try to juggle customers and schedule the most important jobs first,  the shop foreman, (one of the owners) rolls his eyes, groans, cusses and says, "they will get it when ever I feel like it."  If a customer calls and asks when we will check their product, his standard answer is "I don't know"

The other owner, (his wife) doesn't come in until 2pm. She won't allow anyone to quote certain repairs so if a customer asks, I have to say, "You need to wait until **** comes in at 2" If it is a rush job, I have to get them to leave a credit card # that we will run when she gets the pricing done.

When she does come in, she and her hubby fight for the next 45 minutes about various crap. Doesn't matter who is in the office, employee or customer, we all get to hear them call each other a$$hole, etc. Some days they make my head want to explode.

Each day I ask myself why I am still here. It comes down to the almighty $. I am paid well. I get a great retirment plan and I plan on being out of here within 10 years, if I don't lose my mind first.

I keep trying to focus on the next weekend, the next vacation, the next friday and know that this place is what allows me to do the things that I want. But some days, I just want to go postal.

Katy I stole this from you but it is so cute of these two playing that I had too. Hope you don't mind.

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